Life Transitions
Navigating Life Transitions: Embracing Change and Growth
Life is a series of transitions, marked by various changes that we encounter along our journey. Sometimes these changes are rooted in more positive stress (additive- adding something to our lives) like starting a new career, moving to a different city, entering a relationship, or adjusting to life after a baby. But other times these changes are based on more negative stress (subtractive= removal of stresses, people, situations, or concepts) such as the ending of a career, moving in with a parent/child, the end of a relationship, or loss of a close supportive person.
As humans, we don’t change because we are comfortable with the way things are. We change because we don’t like the way things are; because we are uncomfortable. “The only constant in life is change” as said by the Greek philosopher Heraclitus. This is true, we are born, grow, decline, and die. Everything is a process, even if it is a slow process.
- Life transitions are significant shifts in our circumstances, roles, or identities that require us to adapt and adjust.
- Common life transitions include career changes, relationship transitions, relocation, parenthood, retirement, loss, and personal growth opportunities.
- When we experience life transitions, we also experience a range of emotions including excitement, anxiety, uncertainty, grief, and the potential for personal growth.
- Know that when you are going through a life transition, you don’t have to experience it alone, Ironwood Counseling is here to help.
What will I be doing in therapy?
- Research shows that self-reflection, analyze core beliefs, and re-evaluation of life goals, individual values, and aspirations are helpful in building resilience and clarity during transitional periods in life.
- Coping strategies such as mindfulness, relaxation exercises, physical activity, and maintaining a balanced lifestyle have been found to alleviate the stress and anxiety that tends to accompany life transitions.
- Perspective is everything. Being encouraged to view life transitions as opportunities for personal growth and self-discovery is a response to life-changing events that you can control.
- In therapy, we can work together to set realistic goals for personal development during times of change.
Adapting to new circumstances and thriving in the face of challenges is the definition of resilience. In therapy, you will become more resilient. While life transitions may be accompanied by challenges and uncertainties, having the right tools, professional support, and perspective can make all the difference. I am dedicated to assisting you to navigate life transitions, empowering you to embrace change, and embark on a fulfilling path forward. Remember, you are not alone, and with the right resources, you can navigate these transitions with resilience and confidence.
Personal Growth
It’s essential to remember that personal growth and self-discovery are ongoing processes. Embrace the idea that your identity is not fixed, but rather fluid and adaptable. Allow yourself to embrace change and be open to new experiences. With self-acceptance as your foundation, you can grow and evolve into the person you aspire to be.
Therapy can be a valuable tool in this process, providing you with a supportive environment to navigate the depths of your emotions, thoughts, and experiences. We start by cultivating self-reflection and self-awareness. Together we can delve into the underlying factors contributing to how you are feeling now and gain insights into how your life experiences have changed you. This process can help you uncover aspects of yourself that may have been overshadowed or neglected during the business of life.
The process of self-discovery takes time and patience. By seeking therapy and engaging in introspection, psychologist Abraham Maslow would say that you are taking steps toward self-actualization. Maslow’s theory of motivation or Hierarchy of Needs as it is often referred to, outlines the hierarchical levels of motivation in life. Maslow believed that individuals who reach the self-actualization level have met their lower-level needs, such as physiological, safety, love and belonging, and esteem needs.
Self-actualization refers to the process of realizing and expressing one’s unique abilities, talents, and potentialities. It involves personal growth, self-discovery, and a deep sense of satisfaction and meaning in life. This theory states that self-actualization is the highest level of psychological development that individuals can achieve. It represents the fulfillment of one’s potential and the desire to become the best version of oneself.
When a person is self-actualized, they experience a state of self-fulfillment, authenticity, and personal wholeness. They have a clear sense of purpose and values, and they engage in activities that align with their true self. Self-actualized individuals are characterized by qualities such as creativity, spontaneity, autonomy, acceptance of themselves and others, and a profound understanding of the world.
It’s important to note that self-actualization is a dynamic and ongoing process rather than a fixed endpoint. Maslow believed that only a small percentage of individuals fully achieve self-actualization, as it requires continuous growth, exploration, and self-reflection.
You deserve to embark on this transformative journey, and we’re here to support you every step of the way.
Identity
Sometimes we find that we have centered who we are around one of the roles we play (ie: child, parent, spouse/significant other, bank teller/doctor/vet tech..) or what we do for a living. When we define ourselves by something that is not an intrinsic trait, such as being kind, daring, or being a good leader. We tend to feel highly uncomfortable (cognitive dissonance) if/when that role or position changes or is no longer available to us. We experience cognitive dissonance when our beliefs don’t aline with our actions. This causes a mental conflict that is so intolerable that we must either change our beliefs or our actions. The third option is to numb ourselves, but that is another conversation.
This can happen if we define ourselves primarily as a good spouse, bad spouse, good parent, good provider, or good manager. We “know” we are what we believe because we get validated. They tell us we are. But, what happens to our sense of who we are if our spouse/significant other dies, leaves us, or we leave them? Then who are we?
If we define ourselves, to ourselves, as a good parent. What happens when that child goes to college? Moves out? Gets married? Or perhaps things don’t go as well. Maybe they get arrested, can’t get a job, or are making choices you wouldn’t make. It will be hard to BE the ‘good parent’ you see yourself as on a regular, several times a day, basis. This is where people start to question if they know who they are.
We don’t just discover who we are in adolescence because hopefully, we don’t stay the same person that we were when we were young. Therefore “finding ourselves” is something we engage in over and over throughout our life. As we move through life we enter into new life phases we’ve never experienced before.
New experiences, such as getting married, getting divorced, having a child, having another child, becoming an empty nester, burying a child, losing your parents, no longer speaking to siblings, etcetera, cause us to either be walked on or create and maintain new personal rules about how you will accept being treated by other people (ie: boundaries). Our boundaries say more about who we are as people than most of us realize.
Remember, the path to self-discovery is unique for each individual, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. It’s important to listen to your own intuition, take the time you need, and be kind to yourself as you explore and embrace your identity.
Spirituality & Identity
There is an intricate relationship between your spiritual journey and who you are as a person. The journey of spiritual development often leads to the exploration of our beliefs, values, our sense of purpose which ultimately shapes our understanding of ourselves.
Spirituality development has the potential to profoundly impact one’s sense of identity, leading to self-discovery, shifts in values and priorities, a re-evaluated sense of purpose, and increased authenticity. Shauna has an eclectic collection of spiritual beliefs that guide her life but not her professional life. I will be happy to join your exploration and possible development of your spiritual beliefs and what fits for you. Some will want to know more about my journey and how it influences me. I am happy to share, just ask.
As individuals explore their spiritual beliefs and practices, it is important to approach this journey with self-compassion and an open mind, acknowledging that personal identity is fluid and subject to change based on our experiences and our perception of them. Reach out so we can explore these big questions together.